Tim's Human Knight


PDF”: Thames level 13


At a young age, Thames was brought from unknown far away lands to Geoff by his father, Yangtze. Yangtze was a travelling armour salesman, and from a young age incorporated Thames into his demonstrations and pitches. A young Thames was frequently equipped with over-sized adult sized armour, and demonstrate it’s utility with a series of flashy and impressive maneuvers, often to the merriment of onlookers. The frequent routines quickly built Thames’ strength and finesse with equipment, and it was not long before he was demonstrating his fathers wares in practice bouts with prospective customers.

Yangtze and Thames eventually reached Hochoch, where hostilities with the giants were ongoing. The customers in Hochoch were far more hardened and battle worn than their previous customers, but the extra challenge in bouts pushed Thames’ education further from the traditional training drills of the career soldiers into his own style designed purely to win with as much flourish as possible.

With the war ramping up and a ready need for armour the father/son team bought their first shop ‘Armour-geddon’. While business was good, the duo knew it could be better. Most of the damage was being done to the knights on the wall, but due to increasing hostilities and the alert status, few of the knights had time to purchase new armour. Thames hit upon the idea to enroll with the Watch, providing an inside link to sell and deliver his fathers wares to the untapped market.

It was soon after this move that the war came to an end, but having uncovered the market of warriors, often obsessed with finding new, better and ‘luckier’ equipment, and occasionally suffering bouts of paranoia, the opportunities were too great to turn away from. Thames remained with the Watch.

It was several years before Thames left the city walls. The knights were largely equipped with all of the extras available, and the rarity of skirmishes meant that complacency amongst the knights was beginning to set in and there was little that needed to be replaced. Of far more interest to Thames was the new flock of adventurers. The ones that returned often had large amounts of gold, and occasionally some rare or magical armors that could be taken in part exchange. The problem was getting to them before it had all been spent in local taverns, brothels, and even worse other armour shops, particularly their greatest rivals, Seine and Loire who owned ‘Par-Armour’.

Thames’ plan was to meet the adventurers before they had spent any of their trinkets and decided that the best place would be the rowdiest tavern he could find, ’Maxi’s Pad’. It was most likely the first place adventurers would go to tell exaggerated stories, bask in strangers temporary interest, and get drunk. Getting drunk adventurers to buy new adventuring equipment, was the easiest sale Thames had ever made, with the added bonus that they probably wouldn’t remember who had sold them the equipment, or where his shop was. It was during one of these successful sales trips that he eventually met the group of adventurers that he is most frequently associated with in stories. The group that would eventually end up broke and possessionless, clad only in tin foil armour, adamantly claiming that it repels all harm. But that is yet to come.


Against the Giants Thames